Cracking Gym Jokes

Lady Diet from
March 28, 2008
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Welcome to Diet and Fitness Podcast, a free audio podcast sponsored by This is your fit, fun, and fabulous host, Lady Diet, ready to give you the skinny on the latest diet fitness health tips and news.

Have you been to the gym lately? Ever since the New Year began, the gyms have been packed. And they aren’t always packed with the highest quality gym rats. With all the goons around, you’re not guaranteed to have the best gym experience. Comedian Ted Alexandro knows all too well what I’m talking about. His “Gym” joke targets the… um, interesting characters you may encounter at the gym:

Ted Alexandro

Not every gym experience is this funny. Sometimes it’s downright revolting. Like when the incredibly sweaty person neglects to wipe down their machine… and you’re next in line! As much as I love grasping the handles of a stationary bike and finding my hands drenched in someone else’s sweat, not everyone is thrilled with the idea. Make sure you’re not contributing to gym germ warfare by bringing along a towel and giving your machine a good wipe when you’re through.

Also, make sure you need the equipment or space you’re using. Don’t stroll leisurely on the treadmill if there is a line of people waiting for it. And don’t use the mats on the floor to take a nap; they’re meant for doing ab work. Don’t use one weight bench as a shelf for your personal belongings while using another bench to lift. And don’t be one of those pigeon people that Ted is talking about. Checking your form in the mirror is one thing. Staring at yourself for hours from several different angles to really narrow down your best side…well, that’s totally unacceptable.

There are things that people like to hear while they’re at the gym. “Niiiice form,” or “This machine’s all yours,” or “You look like you work out,” are good examples. But there are other things I’m less thrilled to hear while working out. These include, “Oh my God, watch out,” and “Sorry… but can you smell that?” and “FIRE DRILL!” We can all do without unnecessary grunting, loud iPods, and the sound of weights crashing to the floor. Do Lady Diet a favor and please, keep this in mind.

One last gym no-no: If you’re sick, stay home. Everyone here is breathing heavily. And no one needs to be sucking in the sickly mucus your coughing just launched into the air!

Yes, the gym sucks sometimes. But with the help of Lady Diet and funnyman Ted Alexandro, you can turn the yucks into yuk-yuks! Laughing is a great workout in itself. Just make sure you’re not cracking up while you’re lifting 200 pounds of weight over your head!

Do you have any gym horror stories to share? Send me your off-the-wall experience at

If today’s Podcast left YOU cracking up, please visit Ted’s website at for more of his amusing commentary on life!

Stay laughing, stay fit and stay focused with this is Lady Diet signing off!

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