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Rosa Smith-Montanaro is a Virtual Wellness and Weight Loss Coach, and the award-winning creator of the Mind Over Platter program. She also wrote a book of the same name. Her background is in Hypnotherapy, Neuro Linguistics Programming (NLP), Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) and Success Coaching.

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Mind Over Platter

 
by Rosa Smith-Montanaro, Virtual Wellness & Weight Loss Coach

 
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Say good-bye to being a people pleaser and hello to a healthy balance.

Caring about people is very different than caring for people. Being responsible to others is not the same as being responsible for others. Pleasing yourself by honoring the relationships in your life by being loving and respectful may not be the same thing as being a people pleaser. The first examples I provided: caring about, being responsible to and pleasing yourself include healthy boundaries and a level of self-awareness. The second examples: caring for, being responsible for and people pleasing are focused endless amounts of output.

Acting in ways that are fueled by someone else's expectations of you can be exhausting and is not balanced. I am mainly referring to your relationship with other adults who are independent. At times, you may have to care for those who can take care of themselves at times. But it isn't healthy to do it excessively, that's known as enabling. You have responsibilities to people but are not responsible for there actions or even their feelings. Being a people pleaser is going to cost you in all areas of your life if you don't set healthy limits.

Being the best you will involve considering your needs and wants. There is nothing wrong with pleasing your values and beliefs especially when it's moving you in a better direction.

This spring, take a big bold step. Leap toward pleasing the healthiest version of you. If you are a "yes" person...STOP and take a deep breath. If saying no is hard for you say practice it daily. Say "no" to every silly thing that is said to you to desensitize yourself. You are liberating yourself with this exercise. You can also find ways to vary saying no such as: "not today", "this is a good time", "I'll have to think about it", "I have a lot going on and will pass" or plan old "no". If you want to reach your health and weight loss goals this year, it is going to require you saying no to what doesn't support you. For positive affirmations follow me on Instagram.com/rosasmithmontanaro




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