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I’ll Have What She’s Having
My 3 Guiding Principles to Dumping Envy - For Good

By Hilary Boynton

Hilary Boynton, founder of the lifestyle brand Live Yum Yum, inspires others to prevent and reverse disease by embracing healthy lifestyle choices. She is the author of the best-selling cookbook, The Heal Your Gut Cookbook. Inspired by her family’s experience of "food as medicine," she has dedicated herself to helping others on their path to optimal wellbeing. To download her Top 10 Ways to Nourish Your Gut, go to

You may remember the famous orgasm scene, in the 1980’s Billy Crystal Meg Ryan movie, When Harry Met Sally, where over breakfast, in a small café, Sally’s prophetic re-enactment of the “ideal orgasm” prompts the older woman sitting next to her to say to the waitress “I'll have what she’s having.”

We live in a culture overflowing with envy whether it be looks, money, happiness or success - you name it - envy is plaguing America - and it's downright unhealthy.

I get it. I’ve been there. With media and marketing stalking us hard, it’s nearly impossible to escape the alluring messages.

I’ve recently come to realize it’s ok to want what others have, just not the superficial nonsense we think we need.

Have you ever looked at a grandmother covered in wrinkles, boobs down to her waist with a hearty laugh so infectious you can’t help but smile, and think, “I’ll have what she’s having?” Or have you ever witnessed a disabled or disfigured person rockin’ life despite challenges and just know they will accomplish whatever it is they set their minds to, and think “geesch, I’d like a little of that?” Have you ever gone to a third world country and witnessed sheer joy on the faces of those living in “lack” and thought “How can they be so happy when they have nothing?” then realize you wish you could be so lucky.

These are a few reminders of what’s truly important. Striving for the perfectionism, thrown in our faces daily, is not only exhausting, it’s impossible. I’ve said to my daughter, who has epilepsy, “perfection is boring. How fun would it really be if everyone was perfect?” My neighbor, a model, said to me “I think there should be a disclaimer on every modeling shot as the air brushing can make just about anyone look perfect.”

Now I understand the desire to rock your skinny jeans, but if that’s the depth of your happiness then it’s a problem. It’s when we decide to love ourselves unconditionally and turn within for answers that we let go of envy. It’s when we can genuinely celebrate in other’s successes that we will find success ourselves, and when you can be happy despite the circumstances is when others will look at you and say: “I’ll have what she’s having.”

3 tips to ditch the Envy - for good:

1. Daily Affirmations

It takes 21 days to make a habit. Write “I am happy” or “I am worthy” or “I am confident” 21 times for 21 consecutive days, preferably at the same time daily, and you will be reprogramming your subconscious mind and ‘planting the seed” if you will, into accepting these statements as fact.

2. Positive Self Image

I am paraphrasing a bit, but Louise Hay, a 90 + healing powerhouse, said something of this nature - whenever she passes a mirror, or sees her own reflection, she pauses to say “You’re awesome” or “I love you.” Self-criticism is down right destructive. Make it a game and say it load and proud upon catching a glimpse of your reflection.

3. Meditation

Now you don’t have to sit for long periods of time and chant or anything like that. Just a minute here a minute there of noticing the happiness and beauty that surrounds ...    Continue

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