News flash, this just in from the home officeâ€¦â€¦Santa busts his vices!
When reached for comments, the big guy had only this to say,
â€śI am sick to death of everyone calling me jolly just because I have a few extra pounds around the middle. If I hear 'He had a broad face and a little round belly, that shook, when he laughed like a bowl ful of jelly' one more time, I am going to scream.
"Imagine if every year when you went to work, this is how everyone talked about you! 'He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf, And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.' â€¦And the laughter! I canâ€™t stand them laughing at me anymoreâ€¦.I knew I had to do something and since Mrs. Claus lost 55 pounds on the PGX/VBD program, I knew it was the plan for me!â€ť
And hey, I love Santa as much as the next holiday reveler, but it was time for things to change for the healthier for him. After all, obesity is the leading cause of preventable death in America and Christmas just wouldnâ€™t be the same without him around to spread good cheer! He is right, the time has come for Santa to bust his vices with Julia, whether he likes it or not!
For years, we have associated jolly olâ€™ Saint Nick with a stomach that shakes like a bowl full of jelly when he laughs. Hey if cookies and milk were all you ate, you would gain some pounds too! Eating millions of the tasty little treats in one night is enough to ruin anyoneâ€™s waistline! By next year, Santa will look more dapper than Dan Marino, Al Roker, Jennifer Hudson or any of the other suddenly svelte celebs, exchanging his XXL red ... Continue
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