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John’s “common man” approach, which strikes a chord with many overweight Americans, was honed during his 10-year career in the weight loss industry. As Mr. Bad Food, he warns you of fast food, restaurant and supermarket landmines.

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Mr. Bad Food
by John McGran, Food columnist

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Mr. Bad Food has been highlighting and reviewing the best of the worst foods since 2000. I thought I’d seen it all. But then I saw an Internet posting featuring the Quadruple Bypass Burger offered by the appropriately named Heart Attack Grill in Tempe, Arizona.

For maybe the first time in my writing career, I find myself speechless.

Luckily, the proud owners of the Heart Attack Grill love to brag about their beefy behemoth that features 4 half-pound burgers, 12 slices of bacon, and 4 blankets of cheese.

By one estimate, it packs some 8,000 calories. God only know the true fat count.

I am gonna let the folks at www.heartattackgrill.com cook their own goose. In their own words…

“WE’RE DUMB & PROUD!” the site boasts. Their motto is: “Taste Worth Dying For!”

When you go for the “slow smoked half-pound burgers” you also have the option of adding “flatliner fries, deep-fried in pure lard”, Coco-Cola, Pabst Blue Ribbon beer and filter-free Lucky Strike cigarettes.

Why would a restaurant serve up such an unhealthy menu?

“Ours is a world in which insane political correctness stands as a barrier between the average man and his pursuit of happiness; the Heart Attack Grill offers a well-deserved respite of comfort and simplicity. Pondering ‘Single, Double, or Triple’ and ‘Should I hold the onions?’ are the toughest mental gymnastics that any guy should have to perform. We price everything in what we call "even out-the-door dollars." Leave your calculator home. Keep it simple and keep it honest! Oh yeah, and how about being able to get your burger from a pretty girl with a smile on her face who speaks English damn it! The simple pleasures of a bygone era are still alive and well at the Heart Attack Grill.”

What isn’t alive: political correctness and healthy menu choices!

Arizona is known as a state where retirees go to soak up the sun and relax. If too many seniors tackle Quadruple Bypass Burgers on a regular basis, you can bet there will be a housing glut soon.

@ 1:07pm ET on April 28, 2008 I myself am shocked!!! I love a good bacon cheeseburger....but 4 1/2 pounds and 12 pieces of bacon....YUCK!!! No Heart Attack Grill for me!!!
@ 1:12pm ET on April 28, 2008 That sounds disgusting!!!!!!!!! That's enough food for a very large extended family! ewww!!!
@ 1:31pm ET on April 28, 2008 at first I thought it was funny, but than I felt sad that there are so many people that are LOVING this and going here eating regularly obviously to sign up for a some heart disease, and some bypasses please! It's just like that commercial.. I'd like an extra large badonkadonk butt please! I know there are MORE people than not who don't give a rats booty about health and nutrition, but wow it's hard to LOL about this one ;)
@ 11:03am ET on April 29, 2008 How gross!!!
@ 3:30pm ET on May 4, 2008 I like how "the simple pleasures of a bygone era" include xenophobia and racism. Wow. I guess the only good thing I can say for them is that they let their patron know up front that their food will literally kill them...oh wait, that's not so good either now is it?
@ 3:46pm ET on May 4, 2008 The guys behind this restaurant are amazing -- they really do not seem to care about anything other than serving up fatty foods, cigarettes, beer and a side of sexy serving wenches. It's so un-PC, it's almost funny... if it weren't so dangerous to not only diets, but health!
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